Throughout middle and high school, I kept a journal. I still have those journals. I plan to have my daughter read them so she will know I went through similar rough patches and challenges (I don't think any teenager is ever convinced that their parents can relate to them during those tumultuous years).
As a student, I frequently received "atta girl" from my teachers for things I wrote, well except when I took English "101" my freshman year in college. I wrote an article about the school's parking issues for class and my professor was so convinced I had plagiarized she refused to give me anything higher than a "D"!
I've written short stories, plays and books. No, I don't have a link for you to peruse them. Some are still unfinished, some yet to manifest themselves on paper. I have also written letters, not emails but actual letters, to people in my life to express to them my inner feelings, because I am better at writing them than verbalizing them.
So, when I felt led to begin a blog I wasn't surprised that I felt God leading me to write, I was surprised at the platform. I am categorized as having an INTJ personality trait. The "I" in that stands for introvert. What introvert is willing to put themselves "out there" for everyone to see? None. Including me. I wrestled with God about it, but I didn't have the cunningness of Jacob to at least ask for a blessing in return after the tussle.
So, here I am.
On the web.
For the world to see.
I am a bit grateful for this opportunity (a bit because I am still an introvert). It has reminded me that my private and public life should be indistinguishable. Too many times the Christian world has shuddered at a leader/public figure "falling from grace". Too many times we have been called hypocrites, because we do not practice what we preach. Too many times we have taken for granted God's grace and instead used it as an excuse not to live a purposeful and genuine set apart life (Romans 6:1-4, 15).
I suspect that if some people in the Bible knew that their life stories were going to be studied and read for generations to come, perhaps they would have been wiser about the choices they made in their lives.
For starters, maybe, just maybe, Adam and Eve wouldn't have eaten the forbidden fruit (one of the first things I plan to do when I get to heaven is to ask them what in the world were they thinking???).
Maybe, just maybe, Sarah wouldn't have insisted that her husband Abraham should have a child with her maid Hagar.
Maybe, just maybe, David would have turned his head and gone back into his castle when he saw Bathsheba...
If we thought our own lives would be open for the world to see, and potentially for generations in the future, how different would our lives be? Better yet, if we really took to heart that God is observing our lives, every second of the day, how much more cautious would we be with our decision making?
So, once again, writing is helping me, but this time with my personal walk with God. I don't want to embarrass myself, my fellow believers and certainly not God. This blog is helping to remind me of my public responsibility to always strive to live as Jesus did. Not striving to be perfect, but Christ like, so the world can see through me how great and magnificent He really is.
“Here’s another way to put it: You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We’re going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don’t think I’m going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I’m putting you on a light stand. Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine! Keep open house; be generous with your lives. By opening up to others, you’ll prompt people to open up with God, this generous Father in heaven." (Matthew 5:14-16 MSG)
Just Around The Corner,